Building a serious relationship
Last Update : May 10, 2018
Building a serious relationship is the goal of thousands of French singles looking for a love story that is beautiful and lasting. It can be difficult and complicated, however, to find the right person: one who will accept all your faults; who will seduce you every day for the rest of your life; who wants to invest as much time as you do in order to maintain the togetherness and love that you are enjoying as a new couple. Creating a serious relationship is done step by step, with a dash of motivation and a good dose of feelings. Here are our tips to help you find the best recipe!
A serious relationship step by step
To build a serious relationship, certain essential steps are required. The period of being single that precedes a new relationship gives you the opportunity to learn more about yourself. Do you really know what you need to be happy? If you have separated, ask yourself what you want from a future serious relationship. Consider what feelings in the previous relationship you no longer want to experience in the future, such as jealousy or lack of confidence. Building a serious relationship requires you to ask yourself the right questions.
The period during which you get to know your future partner is also a good time for a personal evaluation. Now is the time to shed light on the shortcomings of your former relationship and decide on the criteria that you judge to be the most important, to ensure that this new romance gets off to the very best start.
The perfect man or woman does not exist
You want to live a perfect love story, you are demanding about the criteria for selecting a partner; this is normal. That said, the perfect man or woman does not exist and knowing this, you need to be more forgiving about certain points and more flexible on others. This is a good time to make a small list, in which you set down not only the essential requirements for a future partner, but also the optional ones. For example, you may be looking for a man who has no children and who lives in the South of France. The fact that he is childless might be an essential point to you, but where he lives is something that is open to change and much more flexible, meaning that you could classify it as optional.
These simple self-assessment tasks will be particularly useful in helping to establish a solid foundation for a future serious relationship. Having a vague desire to build a lasting relationship is fine, but it is much better to know exactly how and, ideally, who with! These decisions will be useful during the creation of your advert on the website of your choice.
A question of compromises
After the first contact and a few exchanges, you will start to wonder if the relationship has a chance to become serious and lasting. Ask yourself if you are willing to make the effort to build this relationship. We are not talking about giving in to everything your new partner wants but rather to think about starting the adventure with a flexible attitude. Remember that a relationship is made of compromise and it takes some time to fit perfectly together.
As well as being able to make compromises, it is also important to give a relationship time. There are many who fail, sometimes much too quickly, to stay together as a couple when maybe they should give themselves more chances to prove that the relationship could be made to work.
Taking your bearings, establishing a climate of trust, building the foundations of complicity as a couple, learning to know all about each other and discovering intimacy; these are all steps that require patience and investment. It takes far more than a day or two to understand if you were both made to live together. The strength of love only becomes apparent in the long term because ‘when love endures, it serves as the foundation of your life’ (David Levithan).